Love Me in Spite
by yuuchre
Summary: With the Garreg Mach Ball fast approaching and all the girls at the monastery giving him the cold shoulder, Sylvain realizes that he's going to have to get creative if he wants to maintain his dignity and snag a date for the occasion. Enter Felix: hostile and confused, he's somehow dragged into becoming Sylvain's fake boyfriend for the better part of a month. (cross-posted to ao3)


"Hey, pretty lady. Want to go to the ball with me?" Sylvain smiled, silently praying that the girl he'd approached at one of the courtyard tables would accept and he could finally stop this day-long activity of begging girls to go out with him. Ever since he'd cut ties with a disgruntled caramel-haired girl, he'd been hearing snippets of rumours about himself and suspected that she was the one who'd started them as revenge.

Some of the stories were, unfortunately, true—damn Ingrid for yelling about that incident where he hit on her grandmother they were kids—and others were wild, unflattering exaggerations that caused girls to stare and giggle at him when he walked by. It seemed the entire female population was against him, and he looked like a moron for bragging that he was going to bring the cutest girl in the school to the ball to everyone he came across. It was terrible—every girl he turned to rejected him, usually while laughing or glaring at him.

His grin slipped for a moment when she rolled her eyes and giggled. "Uh, no thanks. Aren't you into older women, anyway? Much, much older?"

Sylvain had to actively sustain his smile to keep his disappointment from showing. "That's just a dumb rumour." He gestured to the whole table and amped up his smile. "Come on, don't one of you ladies want to be the lucky girl on my arm at the Garreg Mach Ball? Anyone up for it?"

The table of girls exchanged glances. He knew he'd screwed up again when the first girl cleared her throat. "Did you really just ask my friends out just seconds after I rejected you? Really? People really are right when they call you desperate."

"Well, I see you ladies aren't interested. But know that I'll be waiting if you change your mind." He made eye contact with each of them and winked before he turned away, only then allowing his face to fall.

This sucked. He'd asked over two dozen girls around the monastery to the ball, but it seemed that his reputation had been tarnished because not a single one accepted. There was some hardcore girl teamwork going on here, which would've been impressive if it wasn't working against him to make his life miserable. Showing up without a date wasn't an option, especially after all that bragging he'd done. He'd look pathetic. There was hardly a point in going if he didn't have someone with him, but who would still be willing at this point?

As climbed the stairs leading to his room, he was suddenly struck with an idea. Maybe it was true that no one wanted to date him, but that didn't mean he couldn't ask someone to pretend to be his date. If he could beg or bribe a girl to pose as his girlfriend, he'd keep his dignity and maybe even eliminate some of those weird rumours floating around. All he needed was a girl to agree to the plan.

Sylvain ran back down the hall until he reached Ingrid's room. He knocked rapidly, mentally filing through all the tactics he knew to girls over. When Ingrid opened the door and saw who was standing there, her expression soured.

"Sylvain. What a pleasure. What do I have to get you out of now?" she asked flatly.

"I have a huge favour to ask. Will you pretend to date me so I can act like we're going to the ball together?"

Ingrid's eyes went wide. "Excuse me? Date you? No thanks. Anyway, were you not aware that I'm already going to the ball with Mercedes?"

She tried to shut the door, but Sylvain stuck his foot inside before she could. "Really? Sorry, I didn't know. Do you happen to know anyone who _would_ be willing to fake being my date so I don't get laughed at the entire night of the ball?"

"No. Solve your own problems, Sylvain. You're going to end up hurting someone if you play with people's feelings like that."

"Not if I find the right girl for the job. Which I really need help with…" He frowned and gave Ingrid his best puppy dog eyes.

"Oh look! There's Felix. Go bother him instead of me." Ingrid crushed his foot with the door until he drew it back and shut the door on him.

"The hell was that about?"

Sylvain turned around to see Felix staring at him, a hand on his hip and familiar annoyance glinting in his eyes.

And suddenly, Sylvain had an option he hadn't considered before. He smiled and shook his head. "You'll find out soon enough."

"Whatever." Felix stared at him for a moment, then frowned and brushed past him as if it wasn't worth his time.

Sylvain let his gaze drift after him as he disappeared into the stairwell, wondering if he'd actually be able to pull this plan off. Sure, things might get a little weird, but it would be worth it in the end. It might just be ridiculous enough to work.

* * *

Sylvain strutted into the dining hall, a bouquet of anemone clutched in one hand and a grin plastered on his face. Nervousness had crept under his skin in the time before dinner, sowing tiny seeds of doubt in his mind and telling him that maybe this was a completely idiotic and terrible idea and he should turn around before he did something he'd regret. But he took a deep breath and shook his head, shoving those thoughts away for now.

"Felix!"

As Felix turned around in his seat at the dining table, Sylvain leaned down and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek. Felix recoiled, eyes wide and lips slightly parted, but Sylvain handed him the bouquet and started to talk before he could say anything.

"Tomorrow, let's do something together. I know a great place in town where we can have lunch, or I can just watch you train if you want. Hit me up, babe." He winked and leaned in, his lips brushing against the curve of Felix's ear as he whispered, "Sorry. I'll explain later." He leaned back and turned without waiting for an answer, ignoring the whispers and stares he'd attracted from people at various tables as he left the room.

The air was cool on his skin as he made his way through the courtyard, but it did nothing to quell his growing embarrassment. This felt weirder than he'd expected. Much weirder. He didn't think it would be easy, of course, but still… that look on Felix's face after the kiss… Sylvain pressed his lips together, suppressing a sigh. It had to be done. All would be well after this plan played out. Felix wasn't his first choice in this scenario, but he didn't really have any other options. Sylvain had known him for years, so it wasn't like their 'relationship' would be totally out of the blue. Maybe pretending to date a guy would even turn out to be a fun change. It would be a learning experience, at the very least. And it wasn't like this was a permanent arrangement. Things would be fine.

All that was left to do was explain the plan to Felix and beg him to agree, the latter of which much easier said than done. He'd probably have to do a lot of grovelling and pleading, but he was pretty sure that he could get Felix to say yes somehow. And he'd be sure to make it up to him—he could find a gift in town or buy him a meal or two sometime.

For now, Sylvain retreated to his room, too ashamed to go back to the dining hall for dinner. Hopefully, things would look brighter in the morning.

* * *

The first thing Sylvain thought when he woke up was how glad he was that it was Saturday. The second thing he thought was _oh shit_.

He'd actually done that, huh? Sashayed up to Felix and kissed his cheek, given him flowers, the whole shebang. Felix was going to be so pissed. Sylvain hoped he wouldn't be angry enough to refuse even considering faking a relationship with him.

He rolled out of bed and got dressed, last night's doubts evaporating in the air of a new day. He had nothing to worry about—he was just going out with one more person, and not even for real. So there were obviously no problems. It would be over soon enough.

Though, it occurred to him that if he wanted people to believe that he was interested in Felix for now, he probably shouldn't be flirting with girls like he usually did. He wouldn't be taken seriously if he split his attention like that. So as much as it pained him, he supposed he had to try and resist.

When he opened his door, something caught in the bottom from the outside. He stepped out and laughed aloud when he saw a bouquet of abused and dying flowers lying on the ground, the same ones he'd given Felix yesterday. He picked them up and gently removed the paper bound to the stems by the ribbon.

Fuck off was all it said, in Felix's delicate handwriting that never failed to surprise him no matter how often he saw it. He didn't seem the type to have such charming penmanship with that hostile demeanour of his.

"No can do," Sylvain said in response to the note as he ducked into his room for a moment to toss the flowers in the trash. He chuckled again and started to make his way to the dining hall, relishing the idea of a meal after going to bed hungry.

He almost sprinted to the dining hall and pushed open the door with a relieved sigh, looking around and letting out a little breath of relief when he didn't see Felix. Curious glances seemed to follow him as he got his breakfast, but he pretended not to notice. He took his seat and smiled at Annette and Mercedes across the table, about to compliment them before he remembered his promise to himself not to flirt with girls. It wasn't like they'd respond well, anyway… plus, Mercedes was taken already. It just wasn't his day.

"Hey. Have you girls seen Felix today, by any chance?"

Annette glanced worriedly at her friend before responding. "Not today, no. Um, not that it's any of my business, but—"

"Annie! You shouldn't," Mercedes scolded, glancing between her and Sylvain, eyebrows furrowed.

"I just want to know what's going on between him and Felix! You have to admit that incident last night was kind of… unexpected."

Sylvain chuckled and waved his hand dismissively. "It's fine, I get it. I guess the feeling sort of snuck up on me, you know? With the ball coming up, I realized that he's the one I want to go with. As much of a shocker for me as it probably is for everyone else."

The girls exchanged a glance, their expressions unsure.

"So you aren't trying to trick everyone? And you're not getting desperate because you can't find a girl who wants to go with you?" Mercedes was playing with the ribbon in her hair, her eyes worried.

"Yeah, I thought maybe you were just messing with Felix or leading him on or something. Sorry, I guess it was kind of mean to assume that, but we couldn't figure out why you suddenly showed so much interest in him."

Well, this was certainly less than a positive interaction. Sylvain hadn't expected to be accused like that, especially not by two of the nicest people in the class. Yeah, it might seem a little strange that he came onto Felix so suddenly, but it wasn't the weirdest thing to ever happen at the monastery by a long shot.

"Come on, I'm not that horrible," he said, trying to keep his tone light and teasing. Were the girls were worried about him or worried about what they thought he was capable of? He couldn't think of anything to follow up with after a few moments, so he distanced himself by picking at his food and trying to keep his smile from slipping.

* * *

"Felix, baby!"

As Sylvain approached from behind him, Felix visibly stiffened. He dropped his mock sword and spun around, storming up to him with such a dark expression that Sylvain stopped in his tracks and was tempted to back up. Well, at least Dimitri and Dedue were right across the grounds, right there if he needed someone to save him from Felix's wrath.

"You!" Felix grabbed Sylvain's collar and jerked his head down so their eyes were level. Yeah, he might just need that backup. "You jackass. What the hell was that in the dining hall? What were you trying to accomplish by making me look like a fool?"

His amber eyes burned with fiery anger as he searched Sylvain's face, lips drawn tight as he waited.

"Look, I'm really sorry about that. The thing is…" He glanced up to make sure no one was eavesdropping. "I need a favour."

"No."

"Felix, my sweet." Sylvain lifted one of Felix's hands and kissed his knuckles, causing him to rip both his hands away and hold them stiffly at his side. "You're my only hope. I haven't even told you what the favour is."

"I don't want to hear it. My answer is no."

"Just hear me out. I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend and go to the ball with me so I can win back the hearts of all the misguided girls of this school."

Felix's face went through half a dozen indistinguishable expressions before he settled on one with narrowed eyes and a tight jaw. "Are you joking?"

"I'm being completely serious. I need your help."

"I don't even know where to start with that. How—why me? What the ever-loving fuck possessed you to think asking me that would end well?"

Sylvain realized that maybe it was in his best interest to leave out the part where Felix was essentially his last resort. "Because I trust you, Felix. I'm scared to ask anyone else because they'll laugh in my face, and I can't take any more of that. I know that even though you might want to punch me or strangle me for asking, you won't laugh. Not like them." Slightly dramatized, but true nonetheless.

Felix stared at him for a long moment, his face going almost blank aside from the way he dropped his gaze for the briefest moment, giving away his uncertainty.

"Well, I don't trust you. Leave me alone."

He still sounded just as angry, but Sylvain could tell by his slip that there was a tiny crack in his foundation. All he had to do was find a way to keep breaking that down. "Come on, you're not scared, are you? Think of it as a little competition—or, hey, I'll pay you back. I'll scout out the market every weekend, looking for merchants selling swords you're interested in—anything you want."

"I'm not going to be bribed like that."

Wrong tactic. "Think of it as payment for doing me a favour. Please help me out? Hey, this way, you won't have to deal with people bothering you to go with them to the ball because you'll be taken."

Felix stared sceptically at him, silent.

"By the Goddess—Felix, _please_. I'm begging you to do this one thing for me. I can't bear the idea of going to the ball alone. Please go with me." Sylvain bit his lip, holding his gaze and trying to plead with just his eyes.

Felix groaned and rolled his eyes. "I despise you. How long would I have to do it?"

Sylvain tried not to break into a relieved laugh. "Only about three weeks, until the ball—then we can stage a break-up and the girls will flock to comfort me."

"I don't think I'm going to be able to stand this. Don't forget about buying me that sword. I deserve compensation for going through with this idiocy."

"Of course. Now, let's do this for real." Sylvain got down on one knee and smiled up at him. "Will you go to the ball with me, Felix Hugo Fraldarius?"

"What are you—yes, I will, now get up! You're going to attract unwanted attention. I'm regretting this already, stupid bastard."

Sylvain jumped to his feet and took Felix's hands in his. "Thank you."

Felix stared at him for a long moment before tugging his hands away and shoving them in his pockets. "Yeah, whatever. Now can I finally get back to my training?"

Sylvain smirked. "Only if I'm allowed to stay and watch, babe."

* * *

Felix's head spun as he made his way up to his room after a day of rage-fueled training, feeling hot all over in the worst way. He couldn't believe Sylvain—what kind of horrible, oblivious, insensitive asshole did someone have to be to act like that? Felix shouldn't have said yes. That, he could admit, was a huge mistake on his part, but Sylvain had been looking at him with those soft, pleading eyes and he'd lost it. How was he supposed to say no? Stupid fucking Sylvain.

The night before, when Sylvain had embarrassed him in the dining hall, Felix had wondered for just a moment what it would be like if Sylvain actually did have feelings for him—but he knew better than to dwell on such ludicrous thoughts. He knew there had been something fishy about that dinner scene and now his suspicions had been confirmed. Sylvain was just using him to get girls. It was just as he expected, which should have made him relieved and glad. So why… why did he feel so crushed by the realization?

He tried to push the thought away but kept coming back to it, unable to face the feelings blossoming in his chest but also unable to ignore them. Okay, so he could admit that he felt a pinprick of hurt because Sylvain expected him to act like he was in love with him just to win back some girls. Honestly, did he even consider for one second how Felix felt? How badly it would hurt when Sylvain inevitably dropped him for a girl? Then again, why should he consider them? Felix knew Sylvain had never felt like he had to consider if Felix liked him or not. The unknown part of the equation was how Felix himself felt.

He was no fool. He saw the pesky signs: how his chest felt tight every time he saw Sylvain flirting with a girl, how his heart jumped whenever he gave Felix that caring, knockout smile of his, the one that appeared when he dropped his playboy front, and even how some nights his mind refused to let him sleep, instead keeping him up and sickening him as his thoughts orbited around one stupid redhead that refused to leave his mind. It wasn't a new feeling. He'd been acquainted with it for years, at this point. But he'd never had a reason to address it until that dumbass opened the floodgates with a bouquet of flowers and a kiss on the cheek.

By the Goddess—he took it back, he really was a fool. He didn't have time or energy for this ridiculousness. He felt… _something_ for Sylvain. Unfortunately. But it wasn't like it mattered. It would never go anywhere—as if he would ever choose Felix over the dozens of girls lined up in front of him. It wasn't worth thinking about.

Felix fell back onto his bed as soon as he entered the room, his head aching. This was fine. In three weeks, he'd confirm that he couldn't stand dating Sylvain and things would go back to normal. Just like he wanted.

* * *

_See you at breakfast, buttercup. p.s. I'll clean up the petals so don't freak out too much :)_

Sylvain's note ricocheted in Felix's mind even though he'd trashed it right after he read it. He almost couldn't believe Sylvain would decide to sneak into his room while he was sleeping and scatter snow-white rose petals over literally every open surface. The only thing that kept him from strangling the idiot was the fact that he promised to clean it up, though his room would probably still smell like perfume for a day or two. And Felix wasn't sure he wanted him traipsing around his room unsupervised. Again. He grimaced at the thought of Sylvain being in his room when he was asleep and defenceless. Yes, they were supposed to act like they were dating, but this was going too far. No one was going to see the petals, so it wasn't like they were cementing the lie. He probably just did it to get on Felix's nerves.

As he angrily pushed his breakfast around on his plate, someone touched the back of Felix's neck and, to his horror, planted a kiss on his cheek.

"Don't do that!" he spat, whipping his head around to shoot Sylvain an unamused glare.

Sylvain gave him a relaxed grin and slid his hand under Felix's chin, pushing it up a bit and running his thumb along the skin just below his bottom lip. Felix felt his face heat up almost immediately, suddenly finding it hard to look Sylvain in the eye.

"Get off." He swatted his hand away and turned back to his food, ignoring the looks he was getting from the other students at the table. "Don't touch me."

"You're cute when you're mad. Hey, what did you think of the rose petals? And do you always keep your room unlocked, or were you just expecting me?" Sylvain took the seat beside him and bumped him with his elbow.

Felix lowered his voice to a quiet hiss. "_No_, I was just distracted and forgot to lock it. What you did was completely unnecessary. Honestly, what were you thinking? Let's just keep it to mildly affectionate public interactions, okay? Don't cover my damn room in flowers again, dumbass."

Sylvain whistled and raised his eyebrows. "Not a fan of roses, then? I was just trying to set the mood. White flowers are a good look for you, though. They give you a splash of purity, you know? Innocence. It's almost cute." He cleared his throat and gave a short laugh, like he was nervous. "What's your favourite flower?"

"Don't ignore me when I talk to you."

"Don't ignore _m_e when I ask you a question. But fine, I'll find other ways to show you my affection. He reached out to touch his face again, but Felix shoved his hand away.

"Stop that." He shifted uncomfortably and looked down at his plate. He couldn't do this. He really couldn't do this. His chest was tight as he took a deep breath, fingers clenched tight around his fork.

"Felix." He looked over at Sylvain, then down at his hand as the fork was gently eased out of hand and placed on the plate. Sylvain placed his hand over Felix's and rubbed his knuckles with his thumb. "You know, you don't… you don't have to do this. Don't force yourself."

Felix squeezed his hand, hesitantly looking up. And there it was: that soft, exposed smile that he could lose himself in if he stared for too long. The smile he both hated and cherished. He blinked and shook his head. "I keep my promises."


End file.
